Reconnecting after Deployment

Many of you know I have spent the last 3 months in Hopkins, Belize managing a guest house. Well I have returned home and have such a deep appreciation of all those years my hubby was in the Navy and what it meant for him to come home. I knew he was so happy to be home and we were excited too. In the early years I had to adjust to him not wanting to go anywhere right away, as the kids & I had done so

many fun things while he was gone (I had to keep them occupied, so we would just go & do stuff all the time), we wanted to share some of it with him, but he just wanted to stay home. We developed the practice of the 3 day honeymoon. For at least the first 3 days it was tabu for anyone to call or come over. This was family time!!! It worked very well, we would reconnect and slowly emerge into society and our outside activities. The other adjustment was relinquishing responsibilities that during the deployment were all on me.
I remember one time (it was a  lengthy deployment) I had been very spontaneous with the kids. Just on the fly I would say, "Hey lets go to the pool, or lets go bowling", things like that. I guess hubby was home for maybe a couple hours and one of the kids said, "Dad, when are you going out on the sub again?" Hubby said "Why do you ask?" "Because mom takes us to do FUN stuff", said the innocent child of truth. That's when hubby & I discussed moderation in what life is like during deployment compared to post deployment.

The new found appreciation I have for what it was like for hubby has probably left some of our friends wondering "What's up with her?" Well it's like this for me:
I am the social butterfly of our marriage, but after being a hostess for guest 24/7 for 3 months I am very much enjoying a few days of solitude. Getting to know my house again, my life again and forming a plan to re-engage in all the things I did before. It's like running at 150mph and coming to a screeching halt. There needs to be a buffer zone while the gears shift.
It was also hard during the last 3 months to find uninterrupted time to spend chatting with our children & grand children. So for the next few days if the only contact I have is with my family that will be the buffer zone I am in most need of right now. Be patient, the social butterfly you all know & love will emerge from her cocoon soon!

The Busy Bee

Which is a much better thing than being a busy body. Staying busy keeps me happy. A project here & there, our monthly BBQ's, or participation in a worthy cause, our life as retirees lends to being able to do as much or little as I like but, doing nothing drives me crazy. In my career life I had limited choices in "as much or little". Goals & Objectives set by bosses meant that to do well you gave it your all, ........ all the time. The rat race of success is for the young (I get tired just thinking about it). Yes, we could have a discussion about the meaning of success and work/life balance, but we'll save that for another time. However, I will say this: My dad always said & I have said many times that a parents deepest desire is that their children be an improved version of themselves. Since our daughter is in the same career field I was in, it makes a good comparison and she definitely is an improved version of me as she does a much better job of life/work balance.

Rainy season makes it easy to do yard projects, the earth is soft from all the

rain but sometimes the challenge is finding sunny days to do the work. Upkeep is a busy project during the rainy season, weeds grow rapidly and on rainy days I think I can hear them laughing at me, not to mention being able to literally watch the grass grow. I have a few more plants to get in the ground yet but, pretty much the landscaping is near complete. Well, maybe a few more flowering plants. I would love to have some "flowers for cutting", so I can get back to flower arranging. Until then, Mexico has a vast supply of cut flowers available, so I think I will start frequenting the flower venders until I define which ones will be easy to grow in my yard. I still have plans to do some indoor painting, so that's a project to look forward to. YES, I love to paint!!

I just about have the monthly BBQ's down to a science. Papi does all the

cooking and I get to do all the organizing, set up & clean up. Don't cringe, I love that part!! It was said of my mother that when people came over she couldn't sit still. She was always washing a glass or wiping a counter, etc. I think I inherited those genes.  There's a couple reasons for that. First, I really do have trouble sitting for hours on end. I am good for about 20-30 minutes and then I have to move around. Some people might feel that's rude, but I'm sorry it's just the way I am.

Secondly, at the end of a long day (our BBQ's joyfully go for 6-8 hours easy, sometimes longer), I dislike very much having to do the clean up all at one time and my OCD doesn't allow me to "leave it til the morning" I am just not built like that. Cleaning as we go works much better for me. By the time the last guest leaves, the food is put away, dishes are done, the counters & tables are clean. I work in stealth mode as our guest are there to be simply that - GUEST! I will slip into the kitchen, wash up a few dishes, refill my glass & return. The biggest improvement I would make to our BBQ's is to convince people that the roof top patio is so much more comfortable. One of these days I have to convince Papi to try doing the BBQ up there or screen in the downstairs porch. The flies are atrocious. But even with a screened in porch it would be so nice to get everyone to migrate to the top to eat & relax for the remainder of the BBQ. OK, off my soap box, maybe after rainy season is over, I will have made some progress on that.

The good causes down here that I have had the honor of being involved with, many of you are aware of: GLOW (Girls Leading our World), CWF (Corozal Womens Forum) & doing PR for CBSC. I have recently been invited to participate in a long standing passion of mine, Ultrasound Education. Being retired from my career in Diagnostic Ultrasound my credentials are in retirement but the knowledge & skill are still there. It grates my last nerve to know that truly good diagnostic ultrasound is not as readily available as it should be in Belize. A fairly new clinic has been established in Patchakan (Presbyterian Medical Clinic). They now have a full time female family practice doctor (with a specialty in OB). They have acquired an ultrasound system. It's an older model but a die hard, work horse that will serve them & the community well. The need for training led them to a gal who is the Director of Ultrasound Education at Presbyterian Mission Hospital in Cincinnati, Ohio. Wendy Skates, RDMS is a good friend of our daughters and introductions were made.

The exciting part for me was when I was asked if I was interested in being a local educational resource after the training was over. I think it took me a split second to say yes. A future blog will fill you in on how it all goes, but can I just say that it amazes me how the out pouring of love & generosity over this mission is allowing Wendy to bring a SLEW of supplies & equipment with her, but the BEST thing she is bringing is her amazing ability to educate!! I truly believe this is just the beginning.


Evidently, the weeds are laughing again, ........... gotta go silence them!!!

Roof Tops and Patios

A Sunday afternoon BBQ to thank our friends in Mexico for their hospitality

& help when we moved here, has turned into a monthly gathering. The August gathering was quite a success! Honey once again "Q"ed up some outstanding chicken & beef, the side dishes were great (Doug got the best side dish prize for his potato salad) and Ana topped it all off with delicious coconut pie. The kids got their hot dogs and we remembered the tortilla's.

Seems most places we have lived we have established this type of event. In

Maryland, it was the "Battle of the BBQ's" starring the neighborhood menfolk who enjoyed the challenge of trying to out do each other. In Singapore they were called "Under the House Parties" as we lived in a British Bungalow on concrete pillars that left a wonderful patio underneath suitable for this. In Guam they were Cabana Parties at Polaris Point (a recreation area), in Florida they were Tiki Hut Parties and in Mississippi the menu was expanded well beyond BBQ type food to include Shrimp & Crab boils and mostly took place at our neighbors house.

Once we hosted a gathering in Mississippi and I got the bright idea that I would put "Gumbo" on the menu. Well I am a southern girl but I wasn't a Gulf Coast native. I knew that because I would often hear people say, "You ain't from around here are ya?" But they said it in the most loving way, ...... kind of like

the old saying, "If you are gonna criticize someone it's ok, as long as what you say, is followed by, God bless their heart or God love em"   It's a southern thing. ANYWAY, so I, not being the sharpest knife in the draw, go to the store and Lord have mercy, my prayers have been answered. They sell gumbo already made in the frozen food section!!! So I buy it, bring it home, thaw it and put it in the crockpot. Yeah I know, that is some serious "faking it". But it smelled great and I was sure it would be a crowd pleaser. Our invited guests arrive and when its time to start the buffet line someone asked me, "where's the rice?". Rice?, you're supposed to serve rice with it? And with the most loving look they say , "You ain't from around here are ya?" We gladly accepted invitations to the neighbors outdoor events and I learned a whole lot about Gulf Coast Cooking (not that I do much cooking in any geographical location)!!

Here in Mexico, there is a distinct cuisine but our BBQ's, boast the backyard

American BBQ menu. Some form of dead animal goes on the grill and the side dishes include Baked Beans, Potato &/or Macaroni Salad, Deviled Eggs, a dessert and of course BEER. At the first BBQ someone asked, "Do you have any tortillas?" My reply, "Lo siento, no tengo" (I'm sorry I don't have). This last one someone said, "I thought about bringing beans & rice". And even though I remembered the tortillas I could still hear that echo in my head, "You ain't from around here are ya?"  But don't worry, nobody left hungry and a good time was had by all.

We had 10 adults and 4 young people attend the BBQ. The boys were happy watching TV & our friend Rosa's teenage daughter was happy updating facebook on her phone. Thank goodness for her though, otherwise there would not have been any pictures. She saw the camera on the kitchen counter and captured the event with a few photos. Now, you know how it goes in a lot of cases, the guys end up in one room & the gals in another. I had set up the dining room with plenty of seating because although the back patio is a great place, until it gets screened in, the flies will

drive you CRAZY, but because the cooler of beer was there, well that's where they guys hung out (God bless em for putting up with those flies). On the other hand I think the gals showed the most common sense. We went up to the roof top patio where shade was plentiful and the breeze was heavenly. So next time I am hoping for one of two things, either the back patio gets screened in or we have it up on the rooftop patio. The only thing we would need if we held it on the roof top are safety spotters on the stairs when everyone departs OR maybe, us gals will just keep it to ourselves- LOL!!

Meeting New Friends and Savoring the Old

I wrote in an earlier blog about leading a host of lives within one life. Being a military wife meant I could put to good use my chameleon skills. Honey would

come home & say, "Guess what? We're moving to, ..............". This meant it was time to meet new friends and enjoy the adventure of a new place and that is exactly how I viewed it. The kids on the other hand went through a lot more turmoil and adjustment, but they never had trouble making new friends. Well, there was that one time I got tired of their moaning & groaning and kicked them out of the house telling them to return when they had met a new friend and had their mothers name & phone number. CPS would probably lock me up if I did that today, but back then it was a different world, sad to say.

Our move to Belize meant leaving our good friends in Mississippi (not to mention all our family & friends from previous lives in the states), but I can still smell the bayou & imagine sitting on the Grafe's back porch or upper deck sipping some delicious beverage, watching nature unfold in the afternoon. I can

still feel the excitement of having all our kids arrive (as a surprise to me) for my 50th birthday. Of course no one will forget our daughters wedding taking place during one of the worst electrical storms & monsoon rains in the history of Moss Point. Note: for those of you not in the know, it was suppose to be a backyard wedding & reception, but that's a story for another day, but the overall success of a potential disaster was due to the love & help of GREAT FRIENDS!!!

In Belize it was easy to make friends There is a fairly large expat community there and being the "new kids on the block" opened the doors to making many good friends. A central hub for this is the Purple Toucan that host the "Friendship Luncheon". Belize (or Central America) is not for everyone, so some stay, some leave and some enjoy many years but later return to their homeland. Circles of friends change too (in high school we called these "clicks"), but when you are older you just call them circles of friends because these circles have different interests and what you don't find in one circle you can find in another circle. I was never part of a click in high school, I tended to socialize with many different ones at different times. That has not changed. I enjoy the friendship of many people for many different reasons or activities and I try hard to not burn bridges. I learned a long time ago to not say, "We'll never see these people again", because inevitably we do. In Belize I have met people that I either crossed paths with in previous places or should have, because we were in the same places at the same time but didn't meet. It's fun to discover how small the world gets the more we travel.

Now we live in Mexico although not far over the border from where we lived in Belize. Which makes it really nice because along with meeting new friends here,

we still see our friends in Belize. Either they come over for shopping & fun or visa versa. It's not uncommon to get an email that says, "Hey are you gonna be around on such in such a day. Want to meet up for lunch?" Works out great, they can store their cold goods from the store in my fridge while we go to lunch. So much gratitude we owe to those who also offer, "Hey would you like me to bring one or two of your boxes that are stored at Colleens?" By the time we finally receive our license to import our household goods, it won't take but a pickup truck.

While visiting this area before we moved here we made friends with several of the owners of restaurants on the waterfront (many of which are related to each other). We re-kindled friendships with a couple folks that had lived in Belize before Mexico. Then when we rented our house, the sister-in-law to the owner became a good friend and very helpful finding what we needed once we moved in. So far all these friends are spanish speaking so I get lots of practice with the language. Then we met a couple (husband is American, wife Mexican), who have become good friends. BBQ buddies he & CT are. And our latest introduction has been to a couple who we are still getting to know but seem delightful. They raise chickens, ducks, & pigs, he is a carpenter, & she is a massage therapist. Both of the last 2 couples are bi-lingual, so now I have lots of help learning Spanish.

I was looking for a good quote for this blog entry and found this:
“People come, people go – they’ll drift in and out of your life, almost like characters in a favorite book. When you finally close the cover, the characters have told their story and you start up again with another book, complete with new characters and adventures. Then you find yourself focusing on the new ones, not the ones from the past.”
― Nicholas Sparks, The Rescue 
 NOTE: I agree with the first part, but not the last. I believe that the best old friends are like a great novel, enjoying it once is great, but being able to pick it up again and enjoy it time & time again is FANTASTIC!! 

"I have been very fortunate to have friends that I may not see or talk to for long periods of time and when we have the good fortune to see or speak with one another,  its as if it was only yesterday." - Catherine Thomas, Aug 2013

It's Been a Long Time, But It Also Feels Like Yesterday

July is a month of emotional roller coaster rides. It is full of family birthdays, celebrating National Holidays such as Independence Day and other summertime fun. It also marks the anniversary of the most tragic thing that has ever happened in my life. That tragedy changed our family forever and put me on a path (a mission actually) to understand the why and how. I put all my energy in a life-long advocacy effort so no other family would EVER have to suffer through the loss of a child due to drowning.

The loss of my 14 month old nephew in my own backyard ripped a hole in my heart that from time to time feels as fresh as the day it happened. I will never forget the details of every second, minute and hour of that day or they days that followed. The sights and sounds can come rushing back to me like it was yesterday.

For the following six years after this tragedy, learning & advocating prevention is almost all I did. I researched, talked to experts and started a non profit. I became heavily involved in local & national organizations dedicated to the same thing. I wrote & delivered lectures to any group that would listen. I spoke at National Conferences and held Safety Expos. It was a passion that could not be sated. We moved to another state and I became a child safety advocate for another non profit, teaching child safety in a broader spectrum of subjects but my nephew was always at the core of why I did what I did.

There is no consolation to someone who was within 25 yards during the silent drowning death of a child they loved and the alarming truth, ...... 
   Safety Expert Mario Vittone stated it plainly in his bog: "It is the No. 2 cause of accidental death in children, ages 15 and under (just behind vehicle accidents)—of the approximately 750 children who will drown next year, about 375 of them will do so within 25 yards of a parent or other adult. In some of those drownings (Personal Note: This was not in our case), the adult will actually watch the child do it , having no idea it is happening."

Click on the link to learn more about why

"Drowning Doesn't Look Like Drowning"

Drowning Risk - Age, Most Common Environment & Why 
The precursors for drowning are different by age group due to differences in physical & mental development. If you have read this far please keep reading. As saddening as this subject is it is imperative that people understand and work towards prevention in their own lives.

0-12 mos: Bathtubs, Toilets & Buckets. –Why? These environments are most available to the child. A brief lapse in supervision, to grab a towel, answer the phone or tend to a sibling can result in bathtub tragedy. As the child learns to crawl, pull them self up and "furniture walk", they feel accomplished and look for adventure. Water fascinates them and they love to play in it, but when that water is at the bottom of a bucket or a toilet, their top heavy bodies make it very easy for them to fall in, at which point they can not right themselves. Do not under estimate a child's capability. What they could not do yesterday, they may very well be able to do today. Keep bathroom doors secured, consider toilet lid locks, empty buckets and never leave a child alone in the bathtub.

1-4 yr old: Pools, Spas & Water Features (ponds & fountains), –Why? Children in this age group are walking, adventurous, have no fear and learn by experience (operant learners). They can learn to open a lock, if they see how you did it. They are problem solvers and will use a stool or climb to reach what they are too short to reach. What they learn, they learn by experience, problem solving and repetition. Children under the age of 4 do not have the mental capacity to understand danger. Which is why when you tell a child "don't touch that", they might even continue to reach for it. At this age & stage, water continues to be a fun thing and the briefest Lapse in Supervision + not enough barriers + no alarms for detection + no aquatic skills = highest risk for a submersion event. Do all you can do to buy yourself that precious moment in time to get to them before they get to the water alone.

5-12 yr old: Pools & Spas, -Why? Children in this age group have usually started to learn to swim, but at a varied level of skill. They interact with other children and play games in the water, some of which can be dangerous. Breath holding can lead to shallow water blackout, dunking and rough play can catch a weak swimmer off guard. Swimming and playing games under water are typical. Teach good water safety or enroll them in a water safety class. Vigilant supervision by parents is always the best drowning prevention. No one knows your child better than you. Parental supervision is paramount, even if a life guard is on duty. At social events where water is near; assign a WATER WATCHER, who focuses only on guarding that no child accidentally enters the water undetected and if a pool is being used the WATER WATCHER is totally dedicated to watching the children in & near the water.

12-18 yr old: Open Water, –Why? Teenagers are more independent and not always under the watchful eye of their parents. They are testing the boundaries, their abilities and often are very competitive around their friends. Drugs and alcohol are a big concern in this age group. Mix together no supervision, risky behaviors, possibly drugs and alcohol with water - Any combination and the outcome can be tragic. Talk to your teen-ager. Find examples of teenage drowning tragedies and help them understand the risk.

18-60 yr old: Pools & Open Water –Why? Risky Behavior: exceeding physical limitations, alcohol use during recreational water activities, failure to observe safety measures and failure to wear Coast Guard approved life jackets (PFD) while operating or riding in recreational water crafts. Underestimating open water environments and overestimating their abilities. Sudden drop offs, current and water temperature should be assessed before entering and use Coast Guard approved personal floatation devices (PFD, Life Jacket) when operating or riding in recreational water crafts.  

>60 yr old: Pools, Spas & Open Water –Why? With a lifetime of safe & experienced water activities there is an underestimated risk of engaging in water activities alone. Unexpected medical episodes while in the water can be fatal. Never Swim Alone. Do not mix water recreation with alcohol and use Coast Guard approved personal floatation devices (PFD, Life Jacket).

NOTE: The American Academy of Pediatrics has modified their position on what age a child should be before engaging in learning Aquatic Skills (it used to be age 6),but with the data reflecting high rates of drowning in the under 5 years of age group, they changed their policy. AAP Policy Update  

During the last three years (sometime after moving to Central America), I have not been actively working for any organization in the field of Child Safety or drowning prevention, but it is never far from my mind. I keep up with what others are doing and look at the data that the CDC post. I am so very proud of what the National Alliance for Drowning Prevention  and it's Chapters throughout the US of A are continuing to do!! 

"I wish I knew then what I know now" is a hind-sighted way of thinking that although true, will never undo what happened 9 years ago. After reading this, I hope that you will make a difference in drowning prevention, if only in your own family.

Thank you for reading,

C

Finding Love & Happiness

When my daughter was born, my dad asked me, "What do you want for her?"

At the time it seemed like such a big question. I gazed down at her and thought of all the great things she could do in life, like be a Doctor or an Olympic Gymnast. It's true, those where my first two career choices for her. Over the years the memory of that one question circled through my mind countless times and I always wondered why. Of all the things that were said to me when she was born, that one question remains so fresh in my mind. The wisdom in that one question inspires me to this day.

My dad was bigger than life to me, he was the epitome of success. A boy who grew up hanging out at fire stations, taken under the wing of a Fire Chief named Donald Key, who enrolled him in Boy Scouts and told him to put your John Henry on the line at the bottom of the form, which gave him the nick name of John Henry, because that's what he wrote on the

signature line. In his admiration of the man that would most shape his life, he did exactly what he was told and many times growing up I remember him saying, "Do as I say, not as I do". But of course, I did as he did, modeled my life after him, striving for success and excellence (when I wasn't getting into trouble - which was a lot, hence ignoring the "Do as I say" part). I had so many more advantages than he did, a home with two loving parents, security, and a Christian upbringing. It was important to me to make him proud. I think if I had the chance to ask him one question, it would not be "Did I make you proud?", it would be "When I was born, what did you want for me?"   If we are as much a like as people say we are I think I know what his answer would be.

The reason his question circled through my mind many times in the course of raising our children is because the answer changed every now and again. Of course as a basic desire I wanted our children to be healthy & happy. Hubby & I worked hard to provide things that made them happy, and for a healthy life; food, clothing, shelter, etc and we were blessed to be able to. As young children what I wanted for them was to be "well behaved" so focus went toward providing discipline balanced with love (at least I hope they feel it was balanced). During the school years I wanted for them "to learn and get good grades", but during their teenage years I wanted (prayed in fact) for them to "return from the alien planet that they had been

abducted & taken to". I say this because I can almost pinpoint the day that I went in to wake them for school and instead of finding the sweet children I had put to bed the night before, I found these alien creatures, that did not resemble my children in any way shape or form! They had bad attitudes, argumentative stances and nothing I said had any foundation of intelligence (at least to them).  I was fortunate, somewhere around the age of their mid 20's the aliens did return them to earth. One of my favorite stories about this transition took place between our daughter & I.

During her teen-age years I heard a lot from her about, "when I have my children I will do this or that and when I have my own house it will be this or that, or my husband will do or be this or that". Children rarely see how good they have it until later in life. My standard response to her rantings was, "OK, I'll make you a deal - when you have your perfect life, your perfect children, your perfect house & husband, CALL ME!! I will travel from the ends of the earth to you just so you can say, I told you so". And of course she would holler back, "I WILL!!!!"(there was always a door slam following that)  Sometime around her mid to late 20's she said, "remember when you told me to call you when I had my perfect life, children, house & husband?" Smiling I said, "yes". She then said, "uh you won't be getting that phone call". We had a good laugh & hug over that. She too will maybe one day have the same interaction with her daughter, who knows.

As young adults I wanted for them to be independent & self sustaining, in other words I wanted them to "get a job & get out of our house" and I say that in the most loving way possible!! I am profoundly proud of all of them for they all have jobs and homes of their own. I am finding when I visit them that they

acquired attributes I wasn't fully aware I had impressed on them when they were growing up. I will use the term "they" now as each have displayed one or more of the following, but not in any order, rhyme or reason. They worry about their home being clean enough when I visit or that I find what they have to be adequate and not in need of "fixing or adding to", but across the board they want me to be comfortable in their home and I always am.

Over the last few years I still see the young child in them when they are worried about telling me something that I may not approve of,  will think poorly on it or them and I have found myself telling them each at different times, "Ya know, all I have really ever wanted for you was for you to be happy and feel loved". You see, it's not a matter of finding love or happiness, it's really about letting love & happiness find you. Let's start with love.

Love finds you when you are not looking for it. When you look too hard to

find love, you may actually be missing out on the simple pleasure of it finding you. Case in point: my husband had been in love with me for a couple years, but I was so busy trying to find love I completely overlooked what was right there waiting for me. It wasn't until I "gave up" on finding love that I realized love had found me. I fell deeply in love & married my best friend and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't feel loved, cared for and grateful for his patience.

Happiness ......., it finds you too. It creeps up on you when you least expect it. It's the warmth you feel deep down when you know what you are doing is the right thing, it's the contentment of peace when you know you don't have it all but you are grateful for what you have. It's the beauty you see that the rest of the world misses because they are not looking at the simplest forms of beauty: a star filled sky, clouds that take on shape in your imagination, a child playing without knowledge of the pressures in the world and the smile on the face of someone you love. It's the comfort you bring another who is hurting. It's the joy you bring to someone by just being you. 

Here's to love & happiness finding you because it sure has found me!
 

Shopping Adventures in Mexico

Before Papi arrived I had the fantastic opportunity to "set up house". This included the purchase of a new stove, refrigerator, sofa (which we have not owned one since leaving the states) & a bed (yes I know we own a bed but now we have 2 bedrooms). Of course Papi & I had looked & priced the kitchen appliances so I knew what he wanted & in what price range.

So off I go, Yee Haw! Chedraui (pronounced Ched-ra-we) is a like an upscale Walmart. They have everything from groceries (including a fantastic selection of wines & cheeses), to hardware, housewares, appliances & furniture. I found the stove & refrigerator I wanted and with my Spanish dictionary in hand approached a store clerk to help me. He had no problem understanding what I wanted. "Neccesito esta y esta" (pointing works well too). Now the hard part, I need it delivered today. "Neccesito es entragar hoy" (not the best grammer but he got the gist). I gave him the address & cross street, made the purchase & nervously left the store. Low & behold, as promised a truck pulled up at 1pm and in came the new stove & refrigerator!! BUENO!!

Now here is the other end of the spectrum. A week or so later I go shopping for a sofa & bed. A store in the same Mall (YES we have a MALL!!!) named Coppel has a fairly large selection of furniture. I looked through there and thought I found what I wanted but just to be sure I had seen all that was available I asked a friend here (Rosa) to take me to where she would shop for a sofa & bed. Turns out we went to the same places. The advantage is that she could communicate the details for me. We find a clerk, show her what I want, she tells us it can be delivered in 2-3 days. (Note: I can't give you the Spanish because they said way to much for my comprehension) OK not as good as the first purchase but ok. When I went to pay for it, the clerk punches it in to the computer and then says, "oh, .., this can not be delivered for 10-14 days. Rosa says, that's no good, we will arrange someone to come in a truck & pick it up. (This is on a friday) Clerk says, OK - Tuesday, it will be in the store Tuesday, but call first and make sure it arrived from the main warehouse. Bueno!

On Saturday I ran into one of the restaurant owners & his wife that we have become friends with and I explain (in my broken Spanish way) that I have bought a sofa & bed at Coppels and need a truck to pick it up on Tuesday. Jose says, "Sure, I can help you with that".  Papi came for a visit on Sunday and his Spanish is much better than mine, so we stop in at Lauva and he speaks to Jose's wife Teresita to explain that I will come to the restaurant Tuesday morning and if she would make the call to Coppels to be sure the stuff is in fact at the store it would be very helpful. (the only thing harder than communicating in Spanish in person is communicating over the phone - no sign language assistance).

Tuesday comes, I go to the restaurant & Jose is there also, so I show him the receipt with the invoice number & phone number - he calls, no answer. Jose, Teresita & I have breakfast together and try a few more times, ....no answer. OK,.......... maybe the people in that dept don't start work until later so they agreed to call again later and I would come back around 4pm (Jose finishes work at 5 and the store is open til 9). I return at 4 and Teresita explains that they have called all day and no answer, DANG, this is not going as planned. So, I go see Rosa and explain whats going on. She says she needs to go near there to pick up her daughter, that I should come with her and we will stop in at Coppels and find out what the problem is. At Coppels the clerk can not explain why nobody answered the phone but after looking in the computer says that it is there and we can pick it up tomorrow (Wednesday) at 5pm. Bueno!!

Papi arrived on Wednesday morning (for good - YAY), so this is even better, he will be with us when we pick it up (it's a manly job). So we went to Lauva and when Jose finished work we went to Coppels to pick up the furniture. Now remember, the day before we were also set to do this but I was told to call & make sure the furniture was there, so called & called & called all day, but nobody ever answered the phone so finally Rosa took me to Coppels and they looked it up in the computer & said, "Oh yeah, its here" so arrangements were made to pick it up at 5pm Wednesday.
 

So we get there, I hand them the receipt, they look it up in the computer & nod (yes its here) the guy goes into the store room, after a while he returns and looks it up again in the computer, gets another guy to verify, goes back to the store room (you see where this is going right??) Finally I see them pulling the mattress out & then they tell us the sofa isn't there - it SHOULD be there, but its not. we load the bed in the truck and then Jose TOTALLY rips the guy a new one (all in Spanish but there was no mistake about what he was saying LOL). It went like this:
"You tell her to call, she calls,  I call, all day we call, no answer, you NEVER answer the phone, how can you do business if you never answer your phone. You tell your customer something is ready and its not. How do you stay in business, if I did that I would starve. NOW you say it 'might' be here on Monday, and we should call. You never answer your phone and you said it was here today and its not, how are we to believe you" 

This went on a good 10 minutes. So Papi & I will probably GO there on Monday (because they never answer their phone) and if they say its there we will ask to SEE IT, then we will call Jose to come pick it up. I didnt have any issues at Chedrauri, I paid for the stove & fridge in the morning, it was delivered in the afternoon. Don't think I will be doing any more shopping at Coppels, BUT, .................. its all part of the adventure and we are blessed with  

GOOD friends here in Mexico.