many fun things while he was gone (I had to keep them occupied, so we would just go & do stuff all the time), we wanted to share some of it with him, but he just wanted to stay home. We developed the practice of the 3 day honeymoon. For at least the first 3 days it was tabu for anyone to call or come over. This was family time!!! It worked very well, we would reconnect and slowly emerge into society and our outside activities. The other adjustment was relinquishing responsibilities that during the deployment were all on me.
I remember one time (it was a lengthy deployment) I had been very spontaneous with the kids. Just on the fly I would say, "Hey lets go to the pool, or lets go bowling", things like that. I guess hubby was home for maybe a couple hours and one of the kids said, "Dad, when are you going out on the sub again?" Hubby said "Why do you ask?" "Because mom takes us to do FUN stuff", said the innocent child of truth. That's when hubby & I discussed moderation in what life is like during deployment compared to post deployment.
The new found appreciation I have for what it was like for hubby has probably left some of our friends wondering "What's up with her?" Well it's like this for me:
I am the social butterfly of our marriage, but after being a hostess for guest 24/7 for 3 months I am very much enjoying a few days of solitude. Getting to know my house again, my life again and forming a plan to re-engage in all the things I did before. It's like running at 150mph and coming to a screeching halt. There needs to be a buffer zone while the gears shift.

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